Monday, March 10, 2008

Dancing on Wall Street

Spitzer Is Linked to Prostitution Ring

(Copied from NYT)

Holy Cow! At last some good news for our friends in the financial markets.

I absolutely cannot believe how cool this is. And I'm actually kind of a Spitzer fan. At last something fun to read about in the news. For some reason this headline has me picturing a group women of easy virtue holding hands in a circle singing, "Ring around the Rosie . . . "

Eliot, Eliot, Eliot. Didn't ET teach you that when you're feeling lonely, the best thing to do is just phone home?

I personally have always been frightened by prostitutes. Primarily because I'm a germophobe. But I also have this feeling that they have to be crazy, actually insane, to be in that line of work, and so might just inexplicably hurt me if I got too close to them. Let alone . . . you know.

But I do have a little prostitute story. I was in Vegas (natch) a few years ago when the Four Seasons was still in Manadalay Bay. So, there were only 2 floors to the Four Seasons, and I get in the elevator at 7:00 in the morning to go down one floor to a breakfast meeting at the hotel restaurant. A young lady, about 20 years old gets in with me. She's running down the hall barefoot to catch the elevator, chatting gleefully with her cellphone in one hand and holding her shoes in the other. A pair of clear, acrylic, backless, and very tall, stilettos. The stilettos were a big clue. In the time it takes to travel one floor by elevator, she looked me over while talking on her phone, wrapped up the conversation, introduced herself, whipped out a business card, and told me that if I was interested to give her a call later. She was a marvel of marketing efficiency.

This woman is not a prostitute. 10 points if you know who she is.

I told my wife about it when I got home because I thought the whole thing was so funny, and gave her the card. My wife then called the, well, "call girl," and gave her a lecture for propositioning her husband.

This is what passes for a wild story in my world. So thank you, Eliot, for spicing up my day.

He's supposed to have a press conference soon to discuss it. That just sounds like about the worst idea in the world. Or maybe the second worst at this point. Let's see what happens next.